Bumper sticker of the day:

You Can't Spell "Crap" Without "Rap"

I pretty much agree with that kernel of truth. In fact, I argue that rap in itself is not music, nor does it resemble any form of art...well, maybe the art of narcissism, opulence, ego, addiction, misogyny, hedonism, and failure. Is it wrong of me to not "get" rap because of all that? More later...

It's a picture like this that makes me think of "home." This is a North Dakota sunset taken from where my Dad and I go fishing, Lake Darling! One of the most beautiful spots I have been to. Maybe it's beautiful because that's where my Dad and I have poured ourselves out talking and reliving stories and memories all while watching for the slightest twitch or movement from our bobbers...waiting for the elusive "esox" to come and try his luck with the "pros from Dover." I wish I was there now. More later...

Currently and loudly listening to the above in the Ipod in heavy rotation. Check 'em out. The Thin Lizzy album is definitely worth a listen...it rocks hard! Armin Van Buuren...amazing DJ...great work out music or for driving like a maniac. TobyMac is just awesome! Marillion is moody, vibey, surreal, and layered. Saga is Canada's number two rock show behind Rush...great live CD, full of energy and tight prog playing. Can you see how eclectic I am in music taste people? More later...

HAPPY FAT TUESDAY PEOPLE!

HOPE YOU STUFF YOURSELVES SILLY!

"EAT, DRINK, AND BE MERRY, FOR TOMORROW WE'll DIE!"
Dave Matthews Band

Well, we actually die to ourselves so that we are aware of our mortality...focusing us even more to the shadow of the cross we stand in. What really needs to die is my own ego, the self, the privilege of living as an arrogant American christian. Wearing that humiliating mark, that symbol of death on my forehead reminds me that the cross does not allow me to live as I want to live: in comfort, indifference, regret, shame, or futility. My life exists always in the tension between the shadow of the cross and the emptiness of the tomb. My life is convicted by the sacrifice of who hung on that cross as it rejoices in the departure of who defeated death out of a tomb. My life needs this journey, this 40 day trek, to penitentially see just how much damage I have created between how I live and how God wants me to live.

I always live in this frustration with me and God. This time of the year asks that I be honest with that life, and that I try to see the mortal nature of who I am in comparison to the eternal nature of who I want to be, who I am training myself to be, who I am trying to become. That I try to live in bringing the kingdom of God here and now, as opposed to looking forward to it, sometime when I die. That's true, but if all I am doing is taking up space on this planet and waiting for my great reward in some far off distant gated community where God lives, my life is nothing but an excuse, or maybe a series of excuses made to make me feel better about how I live, and not how God keeps insisting I am invited to live.

This Ash Wednesday for me, is about sitting in the ancient tradition of sackcloth and ashes, mourning and grieving the death of who I am, who I pride myself to be, who I arrogantly put myself out there as, and who I want to be applauded for being. This Ash Wednesday is about coming back to feeling the breath of God breathe into me, new life. A new life in which helps me be connective to others, pointing to them the breath of God filling their lives, bringing them back to life. This new life liberates me from being attached to my self-serving devices. What a way to live! More later...

When will the press, the lawyers, the emotionally detached family members, and fame pimps, the tourists, and gawkers, and countless lovers LEAVE Anna Nicole Smith ALONE? I am getting sick and tired of hearing about how this poor woman is being disrespected in death as she was in life. It makes me sick to think that this woman's worth is now narrowed down to her estate or her DNA. The sad victim in this is her five month old baby girl. That girl is going to have some baggage to deal with definitely. But, please for the love of God, leave the dead alone. Respect the dead. Unfortunately, when a half billion dollar estate is up for grabs, there is no such thing as respecting the dead.

I do feel sorry for Anna Nicole Smith, who seemed like a lonely person. Yes, she had a few friends, but for the most part, she died alone. This woman had her ups and downs in life, we all do. The media made her out to be this crazy, screwed up, gold-digger who underneath all that make-up and boobs was just another woman who came from the trailer park in no-where Texas. The media loved to gawk at her, mock her, and dance around her as if she was the freak. The true freak in all this is the savage, brutal, and uncaring way people continue to want a piece of her. Yes, she was wealthy, some might say beautiful, and funny, but I can imagine that she was incredibly unhappy deep down inside. You can only maintain this public persona for so long before it begins to eat away at the soul. I can imagine her soul was all but gone, eaten by the public who used her, including the people she called family - her so called mother, her so called "fiance" lawyer, and her so called daughter's daddy. These people suck! Leave her alone. Bury the woman and let her rest in peace jerks.

I wonder if from the best seats in heaven, Anna and her older, oil tycoon husband J. Howard Marshall are simply flipping the world off, wishing a fond farewell to those who want a piece of her, a fairly quick trip to hell. Probably not the most loving thing to do from heaven, but then again, watching people fight over your body, baby, and wealth proves just how stupid, arrogant, and desperate people are to gain the world, but lose their souls. Seeing this whole thing unfold, makes me ask the question, "What is this life without good friends, good sensibility, and a good heart?" Rest eternal grant Anna, O Lord; and let light perpetual shine upon her. More later...

I heard something this morning on Bob and Tom that made me smile, although if you think about it, is actually a pretty sad thought. They had a comedian on who said he drinks Jack Daniels and his love for that and tequila. He was talking about being drunk of course, and he said, "I take drinking very seriously. I truly believe that belligerence is right of every drinker." Sad confession or funny observation? Both. More later...

Since I got it for Christmas, I have been reading a book by the drummer from Canada's premier rock band, Rush. Neil Peart, one of my absolute favorite drummers to ever "hit things with sticks," is also a very intelligent author, very well read, and wittingly insightful. His latest book, titled "Roadshow: Landscape with Drums," is really an epic retelling of Neil's travels with his band Rush celebrating their 30th anniversary two years ago.

Because of the gig I have as a spiritual guru, others call me pastor, I tend to pick up on religious thought or language that speaks kernels of truth, or conversely makes up some twisted abused sense of truth. When I read things of religious or Christian nuance, I try to filter it through what I believe and how I can learn from that as much as possible. Where am I going with this you ask? Well, as Neil and his cohorts are travelling around the US of A, Neil notes just how many churches have signs out in front of them, noting what times their services are, who the pastor is, etc. But, as Neil recalls the day, or his travels, he might mention the church sign of the day: "What's Missing From CH__CH? U R!" You get the point. I get the sense that Neil is not a fan of these cutesy weird ways of advertising Christ. Me neither for that matter. Take for example the saying that's on the sign of the church I am serving right now - "There is no softer pillow than a clear conscience." I am only assuming this has to do with not tossing and turning at night about the problems of the day. But again, I am not all that fond of these signs at all.

Bumper stickers are other weird slogans that point to fanatics as just being odd, namely those who pride themselves as evangelical. These nutsos put all kinds of signage on their cars to tell you just how faithful they are. Plus, their car becomes a travelling billboard. Sick! I did see a bumper sticker that read, "In case of Rapture...Can I have your car?" That's clever...made me about double over in laughter! It plays on that other stupid bumper sticker that reads, "In case of Rapture, this car will be un-manned." Which if you think about it, becomes not a car, but a missile. Other examples that grind at me: "No Jesus, No Peace...Know Jesus, Know Peace," "My Boss is a Jewish Carpenter," "This Blood's For You," "God Bless America," "Put Christ Back In Schools," "End Abortion Now!," "As A Former Fetus, I Oppose Abortion," "God Made Adam and Eve, Not Adam and Steve," "Get right with God, or get left." Those are just some of the sick and twisted, but there are others out there just as bad.

Why do some people insist on letting you and I know just how much they are faithful to God? Who cares?!? If you are faithful, great, give God glory. But, don't point the finger back at yourself as if to say, "Look at me, aren't I special, faithful, and conservatively right?" What bothers me about the whole bumper sticker mentality is that it all becomes just another gimmick, another flashy lure, another oddity to point at Christians, even though the owners who show off their stickers with guiltless pride, are most likely turning off the non-Christian even more. The non-Christian sees the mostly mini-van obsessed evangelical driving along at the ever so careful speed limit, and wonders why Christians need to advertise their need to convert for everyone to have to put up with.

Frankly, it all makes me want to barf and blow the chunks of religious freedom all over the hoods of these pie-in-the-sky rapturephiles who insist on being hyper-evangelical to the point that the bumper stickers represent just how shallow this theology really is. This theology of glory is not what I signed up for in being a follower of Jesus. What I mean is that there are people who hope that God would simply come back and reclaim his world so that His kingdom will be established. And while these people are wishing this to happen, they are ignoring the language, the humanity, and the value of the non-Christian, the agnostic, the atheist, the one who worships dead Egyptian cat princesses...you get the point. Most evangelicals want to convert those who do not believe to ultimately believe, like them. They want to show you the truth in the hopes that you realize just how wrong you have been all along. It has that "shove the dove" mentality that makes me ill.

People who do not follow Jesus as closely as others, do not need any more reason NOT to believe. They need love. They don't need gimmicks. They don't need the culture of cool to surround them to make them feel acceptable. Those who are shaky in their pursuit of who God made them to be, who begin at the very beginning of that pursuit do not need the shiny-happy Christians throwing bible bombs, showing off the bumper-stickers, praying the rapture comes, glossalalic (speaking in tongues) Bush voting weirdos just how not interested they are in actually caring for the poor, the hungry, the naked, the addicted, the frail, etc. You want to change the world by getting more people converted? Lead by example and take care of the needs most ignored in your communities...people will begin to sense something's not the same, and they will question why that is. People are drawn to a person who does not talk about their belief in Jesus, but in one who participates in believing this Jesus still meets the needs of all people in feeding them, clothing them, healing them, and loving them for who they are.

You know, we all sit in glass houses, but it seems that those who do most of the rock throwing do it from behind their brick walled, stained glass fortresses they call churches and they blatantly get away with it. Why? Because it's all for the kingdom...at least that's what they believe. The whole bumper sticker mentality is just another rock thrown at you and I, in the hopes that it strikes us, waking us up to a certain type of theology that we are supposed to buy into. It's all excremental, and will always smell bad. But, see the modern day American Christian operates that this is God's chosen nation, and that we are to lead the world in conversion. Take your agenda of conversion and blow your nose in it for all I care. Oh yeah, the best "Christian" symbol I saw on the back of a vehicle was the fish symbol, and then in the body of the fish said, "...and chips!" More later...

Did anyone happen to watch the Grammys the other night? Yeah, I forced myself to watch for a few reasons. The Police performing got me to watch. They were awesome. Seeing Stewart Copeland play drums is very cool. But, then after that, the Grammys lost steam big time. What was up with Mary J Blige's dress. As she walked up to receive her Grammy, I noticed that the dress she had on was very revealing, as it revealed her posterior, and the line or should I say, LINE therein. Now, no one wants to see anyone's crack, much less on TV. It was also not very tasteful that she had on this dress, and then these ugly tattoos on her flabby arms. Wasn't there a time when Mary J. Blige was uh, cut and toned?

So, the Dixie Chicks took home a few Grammys, namely album of the year. NOW, I have to disagree with this one for all that is holy. This CD should not have even been considered. I cannot stand the Dixie Chicks....I couldn't stand them even before Natalie Maines shot off her mouth about Bush. Regardless of her political stance on things, she just proved to the world the other night that she is a bonafied ditz! Her ramblings, and her lack of articulation proved to me that some people just should not talk, but simply say thank you. I was not impressed at all by that Grammy and who it went to. Hell, it should have gone to John Mayer...at least that man has some articulation, and he's doesn't dork out at the microphone.

One of the highlights for me, was seeing the Red Hot Chili Peppers close the show. I like the Peppers. I used to listen to them way back in high school, and continue to really enjoy their music. Flea is just on a different planet with his bass playing. Chad Smith is a great pocket, articulate drummer. And Anthony and John are incredible too. Can someone explain to me though what was up with all the confetti as they were playing? Did someone think this would be artsy? All this was, was annoying for the TV cameras, and people there at the show trying to take pictures. What was kind of funny, was after the Peppers played they had Queen Latifah and someone else announcing something, and the confetti was still coming down, and a few pieces landed down her dress into her cleavage area. Rather funny to watch her pick them out.

The scrolling on the bottom the picture too, threw me off a few times. The scrolling was to let me know who won other Grammys in the not so made for TV categories. Yes, I want to know who took home best metal performance. I remember a time when they would dedicate TV time to not only presenting that award, but also might have a performance of a band in that category. Interestingly, Slayer took home that award this year. But, I do find whoever decides who the Contemporary Christian Music/Gospel awards goes to, knows what they are doing. Every year, it seems this category just gets more clueless. Chris Tomlin was at least nominated, but did not take the Grammy for either category he was in. Sad. Who won the best pop/contemporary gospel album? Third Day!?! Chris Tomlin should have won this hands down. Chris was also nominated for the best gospel album of the year, but Yolanda Adams won. Now, again, it goes to show that people are clueless when Tomlin is overlooked. Better yet, the David Crowder Band was not even nominated! Just makes me disappointed in the stupid Recording Academy. Oh yeah, and don't even get me started on the whole best rock or rap gospel album!!! Oh yeah, and STOP CALLING ALL THESE CATEGORIES "GOSPEL!" Gosh durn idjits!

The Grammys are just not good. If I want to hear the Eagles, I don't want to see the Rascal Flats butcher their classics. Nor do I want to hear some adolescent blond chick sing Desperado...what does she have to be desperate about...she hasn't lived long enough to be desperate about anything! Overall, I was disappointed in the Grammys because they represent all that music is - slick, cookie cutter, overproduced, fake crapola! There was enough silicon and makeup in that room to make any drag queen salivate! Let's see some artists that still mean something. Let's see some artists that are good at what they do. I mean take for example, Prince was there. Why not have him perform after his well received Super Bowl half-time show? The Grammys this year, lacked everything that music is supposed to be about - soul. It has no soul, not in the music sense, but in the sensibility, respect, against the world sense. Music is about rebellion, empowerment, energy, passion. Some would say there were moments like that, but overall, I saw nothing that inspired me, or made me want to go out and add to my music library. Well, maybe the Best Classical Album - Mahler Number 7, is definitely one for the hearing! The Recording Academy is a laughing stock...a joke! Clueless bunch of morons who couldn't realize talent if it gave them all orgasms, or better yet, herpes! Because of the incompetancy of the Recording Academy, the Grammys have become like a junior high pecking order. Only the popular get noticed, and only they, are allowed to have the accolades. And the regular people, are all igonored. I am all about the underdog in music. I like the bands who are smart enough to not be slick, or wide-spread. I like the music that has no chance of ever being noticed by the Grammy machine. Slayer surprises me. But then again, maybe they were finally due...gee, since they've only been around since '83!

I wish I had a hand in the nominations for the Grammys. I would clean house. Let's just say, the talentless beautiful people would not have the prime time, and the talented Latino drum corps from Havanna would take center stage! Oh, and the Pet Shop Boys, The Sundays, Dream Theater, and the Killer Dwarfs would play. Rush would also make an appearance as the house band! Anyone else? No country music...keep that rubbish to yourself! More later...

Some random things about my day today:

Thinking that the live version of "Comfortably Numb" from "Delicate Sound Of Thunder" is my absolute favorite version of that song from Floyd!

Reading a great book titled, "The Perfect Thing" by Steven Levy. This book is all about the development, marketing, and culture of the Ipod. Fascinating book!

Tiring of things made with or exclusively for hamburger!

Sad that someone I gave communion to a few weeks ago is dying.

My friend John leaving me the strangest voice messages on our answering machine, and freaking my wife out as she has no idea the oddity or slightly moronic disposition some of my friends from high school seem to still live by...myself included at times.

Giving my son his first set of Marvel Action figures - Batman, Superman, and Wonder Woman, or as he calls her, "WOMAN!" Seeing him play with all of them is great...brings back lots of memories.

Watching American Idol and actually liking the show. God help me. I have successfully avoided the show for five consecutive seasons...why now?

Feeling tired and slightly tapped out...maybe all the driving I do doesn't really help that either.

Plus, I am tired of not knowing what direction the future is taking me and my family.

Feeling kind of bothered that the drum kit I play for worship band is without an actual ride cymbal. My 16" HHX is filling in for now, but it's just not the same (sigh!)

I love my son's smile, his eyes, his energy, his innocence, and his wonder about everything!

I LOVE what I do right now, right where I am. Definitely the best change for me, in the right environment, with the right people. Amazing how perspective changes for all people when the system is new and full of energy!!!

More later...

I have got to get me one of these Bibles!!! These are the bibles that are given away at Porn conventions by a group of guys who run a website and ministry called xxxchurch. Their website is xxxchurch.com

One of the founders of xxxchurch is Craig Gross. He wrote a book titled "Dirty Little Secret." Go out and buy this book now. It will change the way you think about and see how pornography is tearing households, and marriages apart, all because of the fantasy, the objectification of women, and the commercialization and acceptance of sexual or suggestive imagery intentionally around us. I appreciate the way he and his friends have taken on this never talked about issue, and has brought this issue into churches for people to be educated about, deal with, and have conversations about. Not to mention, there are churches who now have recovery groups for porn addicts because xxxchurch got the conversation started. Thanks guys. Thanks for being honest, gutsy, and faithful as we all wish we could be, in taking on this behemoth of destructive issues.

Incidentally, tomorrow night (2/2) on Nightline, they are going to run a story on xxxchurch, featuring a question and answer between Craig and porn star Ron Jeremy. The question Martin Bashir asks Craig, "Do you think Ron Jeremy will make it into heaven?" has me watching just to see how Craig will answer. More later...